The tree in my front yard apparently grows six feet every 30 seconds, which creates a problem when the house is less then six feet away. Last thunderstorm the branches kept smacking against the window like it was possessed by demons etc.

Affordable Tree Service ™ wanted $230.00 to trim it. Thanks, no.

Bought a chainsaw-on-a-pole thingy for $99. Now, next thunderstorm I will be safe from Demon Tree and will have plenty of firewood and I have a new toy. I’m thinking chainsaw-on-a-pole will be useful at parties.